Showing posts with label honest commuciation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label honest commuciation. Show all posts

Become Aware of The Feedback In Your Life!


Our minds are a lot like a feedback loop.

We process information from our environment, we respond to it through our actions, and then we get new information back based on the effects of those actions. This cycle continues as we continue to adapt and change to new situations in our lives.
One key to happiness and success however we may define those terms, is paying attention to this constant feedback as much as possible.
When we do things that get positive feedback, we should continue to do those things in the future, because we know that they work and bring desirable results. And when we do something that gets negative feedback, we should change our course of action in hopes of getting different results.
However, some people try to ignore this feedback or they just aren’t good at being fully aware of all the feedback they get from their lives. They get stuck in their own ways, staying attached to old habits and old ways of thinking and believe those are their only options. Not because they actually worked or helped them live better lives but because that is all they know to do.

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." -Albert Einstein
The more you pay attention to the feedback in your life, the better you can adapt and change to your life in a healthy way.

We receive feedback in a variety of forms including but not limited to:
  • The feedback we get from our actions. Does doing that thing bring you closer to your values and goals in life or further away?
  • The feedback we get from people. Are your friends, family, coworkers, or whoever responding positively or negatively to what you do and say?
  • The feedback we get from our bodies. Does eating that make you feel healthy or less healthy? Does doing that activity make you feel fit or less fit?
  • The feedback we get from our emotions. Does doing that make you feel more emotionally stable or less emotionally stable?

Everything we experience can be viewed as a type of feedback. To make the most of this feedback we have to exercise both awareness and honesty on a daily basis. This is the beginning of knowing what needs to change in order to improve and grow.
The first step is to pay more attention to things we normally don’t whether it’s our emotions, habits, relationships, health, work, or whatever else it is that makes up the components of our lives.
Be a witness to your life to help build more awareness to your everyday thoughts, habits, and routines.
Once you learn to harness your awareness in one area it will become easier to apply that same focused awareness to all other aspects of your life. In doing so, you’ll become more attuned to the various forms of feedback you get every day.
Secondly, to make the most of your feedback you need to be honest with yourself as much as possible. If you always distort your feedback into something positive or negative and you don’t actually see what the feedback is truly communicating, then you won’t be able to respond to that feedback in the most effective way.
Be more aware of your actions and be honest about their effects because that is the beginning of knowing what is needed to improve all aspects of your life!

Get the tools you need to excel in your life! Work with a Business and Life Management Coach who has over 20 years’ experience empowering people to attain self-defined success in their professional & personal lives. Denise’s passion for personal development is at the core of her business and life philosophy and is committed to helping others achieve their full potential in order to live richer, more fulfilling lives. Book a complimentary session at http://www.denisedema.com to get started in reaching your goals today! Phone, on-site and e-mail coaching available.

Ref: Emotion Machine

Seek First to Understand and Then Be Understood!

Each day we encounter different people from different places that have different opinions about everything.

Have you ever been with a family member, friend, business college or an acquaintance that has very strong opinions where you clearly disagree about something? You probably go around in circles until you think this will be the last time that you will disagree with that person because clearly they do not understand your perspective. Often times the conversation escalates to the point where one person isn’t listening anymore but yelling to get their point across. Then all communication breaks down at that point and different perspectives are no longer discussed. 

So try to think about this for a minute. Just because you are never going to agree,  because you have different opinions, does not mean you “should” agree. It’s not about being right or wrong but about being aware and respectful of our differences. Communication in a respectful, calm way is the beginning to understanding others and being understood.

Is it realistic to expect other people to understand us when we are not willing to listen or understand another’s perspective?” Imagine what our world would be like if we first started our conversations based on understanding. The quote “Seek to understand and then be understood” is relevant now more than ever. There are so many fascinating ways that people live their lives from what people wear to their political philosophy to how they choose to enjoy their lives.  By choosing to understand, we can create conversations that are based on acceptance of our differences as opposed to allowing those differences to make us angry and fearful of each other.

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” ― C.G. Jung

What about this: “You believe what you believe. I believe what I believe. And that’s alright. ” I believe that just because someone has a different perspective from us it doesn’t mean that we cannot try to understand where the other person is coming from. With so many people, cultures, perspectives floating around how can we all have the same opinions? If we did it would make the world pretty boring. So we can all agree to disagree but still seek to understand in a respectful way.

The key to this concept of agreeing to disagree is honest communication. I think that it is important to ask the other person why they feel the way they do. While you may not be able to change the other person’s perspective, you will be able to open your mind and understand it. Respect not only applies to people but also to beliefs. By agreeing to disagree we can respect other people’s beliefs without necessarily calling them our own.

I think that “difference” is an amazing thing and choosing to understand them can truly allow us to grow as individuals. Difference can expand our perception of what is possible.  Understanding is a mindset, it is a choice that can be challenging at times but it allows us to learn more and grow by creating more connections. Building connections helps us learn more about the world we live in. You never know what you may learn if you open your mind……………

“Only the development of compassion and understanding for others can bring us the tranquility and happiness we all seek.” ― Dalai Lama XIV

Get the tools you need to excel in your life by working with a Business and Life Management Coach who has over 20 years’ experience empowering individuals, executives and business owners to attain self-defined success in their professional & personal lives. Denise Dema’s passion for personal development is at the core of her business and life philosophy and is committed to helping others achieve their full potential in order to live richer, more fulfilling lives. Book a complimentary session at http://www.denisedema.com  to get started in reaching your goals today! On-site, phone and e-mail coaching available.