Calm Your Mind

At this time dealing with the Corvid-19 Pandemic, It's important to have patience and connect again with simple pleasures that bring comfort and peace.

 
“The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. As long as this exists, and it certainly always will, then there will be comfort for every sorrow, whatever the circumstances may be.” —Anne Frank

The Importance of Developing Your Emotional Intelligence

As a Business and Life Management Coach for over two decades, my national coaching practice specializes in the development of human potential and personal effectiveness for professionals and individuals. More now than ever, organizations are focusing on their future leaders Emotional Intelligence abilities. Executives, business owners and entrepreneurs all need to develop their EQ beyond their IQ in order to be successful, increase productivity and/or gain promotion within their chosen fields. 

Emotional intelligence (EQ), as it is known today, came into the spotlight when Daniel Goleman published his book “Emotional Intelligence, Why It Can Matter More Than IQ” in 1995; however, the study of different forms of intelligence began long before that book, with some research papers dating back to the early 1900's. Since that time, many researchers, training and development professionals use tools to implement EQ concepts and to build individual EQ.

Emotional intelligence is the ability to sense, understand and effectively apply emotions to facilitate higher levels of collaboration and productivity.

 

Intrapersonal Skills refer to the ability to understand oneself, form an accurate concept of the self and apply that concept to operate more effectively. There are three pillars that make up the intrapersonal side of EQ:

• Self-Awareness is the ability to recognize and understand your own moods, emotions and drives as well as their effects on others.

• Self-Regulation is the ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods. This includes the propensity to suspend judgment and to think before acting.

• Motivation is a passion to work for reasons that go beyond money or status and to pursue your goals with energy and persistence.

Interpersonal Skills refer to the ability to identify and understand how to effectively relate to, work with and motivate others. There are two pillars that make up the interpersonal side of EQ:

• Empathy is the ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people and the skill to treat people according to their emotional reactions.

• Social Skills is the proficiency in managing relationships, building networks and the ability to find common ground to build rapport.

Emotions are carried down an organization’s hierarchy, basically affecting everyone. If you want to positively affect or even change an organization’s culture, it’s vital to start developing the EQ of its leaders. Enable them to be more self-aware and empower them to manage the emotions of others.

Working with individuals that are primarily business-focused, I offer coaching and consulting designed for leaders, managers and executives striving for promotion. Mentoring is geared towards people who set the tone for interpersonal interaction within the organization or within a team. Training develops communication effectiveness, conflict resolution, sales effectiveness and relationships to name a few topics. It is often paired with Behavioral Modification techniques that add the behavioral component to emotional intelligence development.

To learn more about how you can improve your professional career and skills through developing your EQ, book a complimentary session at www.denisedema.com.

How to Deal With the Negative News

The Proven Health Benefits of Positive News....

Many people are grappling with this year’s depressing and disturbing news—meaning, they want to turn away, but they just can‘t.

The constant focus on partisan politics—as well as murders and mayhem—is taking a real toll on peoples’ psyches.

The surgeon Dr. Christiane Northrop says our nervous systems simply weren’t designed to handle a daily barrage of bad news which contains the worst of humanity, brought to you from every corner of the globe. The inundation is too much for most people.

The trend toward sensational bad news on television began in the 1990s. At the same time as the U.S. homicide rate was dropping in that decade by 42%, television news coverage of murders skyrocketed—rising more than 700%, according to the Center for Media and Public Affairs.

During that time, TV network news audiences and newspaper circulation began to fall. We can only guess that this was due to the increased focus on crime coverage.

Instead of gorging on an endless media diet of conflict, some people have taken drastic action, by closing their eyes and turning off the news altogether. (They are also unfriending their angry brother-in-law or friend whose partisan posts contaminate their Facebook feed.)

Completely tuning out the news, however, is not a great solution. To be an informed citizen and voter, we need to know what’s going on. Instead, I recommend that people become “selective sifters”, choosing what kind of news they take in daily. Headline news from the BBC or NPR, or perusing newspapers and magazines is enough to provide the basics.

Most people will need to make a conscious effort not to get sucked into the rancorous trivial debates of the day, like how much Melania Trump’s jacket costs when she travels into a poor neighborhood—and the inference that it should make anyone angry if they are a Liberal.

It’s not enough, though, to just sift through the bad news. Norman Cousins, a political journalist and 30-year editor of the Saturday Review said, “If news is not really news unless it is bad news, it may be difficult to claim we are an informed nation.”

There is another crucial step that people can take to relieve some of their anxiety around current events. They can write themselves a prescription for a daily dose of good news. Like a “Vitamin G” in their media diet it can provide some balanced nutrition beyond the negative news menu.

A Happy You prescription - book cover

I look at it this way: If a child is only given junk food, then that’s all he knows and wants, but if he is given some sweet carrots, watermelon or apples, he learns to appreciate them, and gets the benefit of an enriched diet and healthier body.

Thomas Jefferson said the job of journalists was to portray accurately what was happening in society. As a former TV news freelancer, I created Good News Network (GNN) because the media was failing to report enough of the positive—and it was simply too hard to find good news in large enough quantities to make a difference in one’s mental health.

An overabundance of pessimistic, depressing stories can create a perception of a crime-and-greed-filled-world that is out of proportion with reality.

Benefits to Physical Health

According to letters from GNN readers, the website is playing a major role in relieving depression and anxiety symptoms—and basic physical health, too, can be altered when you make an effort to balance the depressing news. Scientific studies have shown the startling benefits.

In a study of nearly 3000 healthy adults, a London University found that those who reported upbeat moods had lower levels of cortisol—the ‘stress’ hormone that leads to high blood pressure, weakened immune systems, and even abdominal obesity. In the study, women who reported more positive emotions were less prone to chronic inflammation, which is related to heart disease and cancer. The authors of the paper published in the American Journal of Epidemiology in 2008 said, “People need to recognize the things that make them feel good.”

Researchers at the Harvard University School of Public Health found that optimism cuts the chances of developing heart disease and the rate of lung-decline as we age. They followed 1300 men in their early 60’s for ten years. “Lung function declined significantly faster in pessimists, even taking into account major biological risk factors.”

A Dutch study of elderly men found that those who were identified as “optimistic” were associated with a stunning 50 percent lower risk of cardiovascular death during the 15-year study.

Benefits of Mental Well-Being

A study by J. P. Harrell in 2000 found that when participants watched concentrations of positive news and media, they had decreased levels of stress and anxiety. A study by Huffington Post and Harvard Researcher Shawn Achor showed that if people watched even 3-4 minutes of negative news, 27% of participants were more likely to be depressed for the next 6-8 hours of their day.

Testimonials sent to Good News Network provide self-reported anecdotal evidence that supports the notion that positive news can actually improve your health.

15 year old Lisa says, “Daily, I was affected by panic attacks which were triggered from the news and all its negative content. This site has helped me tremendously.”

Mike says, “I suffer from depression and paranoia. I feel like I can never truly be happy as I always get this sense of encroaching doom and most of my fears are heightened by media sensationalism. Your website is JUST what I need to focus.”

And finally a clinical and police psychologist, Dr. Kevin Keough, wrote this, “A 13 year-old boy was depressed and suicidal as he entered my office. He cited TV news as proof that there was no point to living, ‘Everything is out of control, it’s all bad news, people are killing each other, terrorism, corruption, kids being slaves.’ After I let him cry, I explained how TV news worked—that it didn’t reflect reality accurately—and I showed him your site. He started to cheer up. He smiled and gave me a hug. Life was okay again.”

Tal Ben-Shahar was a lecturer at Harvard University and his positive psychology course was the most popular class on campus. Author of ‘Happier’, and ‘Choose the Life You Want’, he believes the Good News Network can benefit everyone: “It’s an extremely important initiative. I recommend that each person makes it a habit to visit the website at least once a day to counter the barrage of negativity in the media. Being exposed to positive information benefits us emotionally, physically, and mentally. It can contribute in a meaningful way to a happier and healthier life.”

A 2005 study by Bayer concluded that an overwhelming 93% of Americans wanted more good news, and 77% percent believed there was not enough good news offered by mainstream media. The study also showed that people believed they are more productive in their jobs after hearing good news.

Fortunately, good news is now easy to find at GoodNews Network.

What we think in our minds directly affects our health. Through the mind-body connection, our thinking leads to stress or happiness. It is your choice—and your health depends on it.

Expand your knowledge and enlighten your mind with tools to help you excel in life. Complimentary Coaching Session at: http://www.denisedema.com/

Become Mentally Tough!

Want to be successful in life? Know this: It takes a special kind of fortitude and it’s what separates the elite from average performers. When the going gets tough, the tough don’t get going—they reach for a winning prescription called mental toughness.

What’s mental toughness all about? It’s been described as the “ability to work hard and respond resiliently to failure and adversity; the inner quality that enables individuals to work hard and stick to their long-term passions and goals."

Vince Lombardi believed that mental toughness was one of the most important leadership skills you could attain. Psychologist Angela Duckworth based her life's work on it (she refers to it as grit) and believes that it’s a true predictor of success.

The “4 C’s to Mental Toughness”

Psychologist Dr. Peter Clough developed the “Mental Toughness Training Model,” a psychometric assessment measure, which enables users to assess mental toughness in four core areas:

Confidence
Challenge
Control
Commitment

Here’s how you can use the components to your advantage and become more mentally tough:

1. Confidence

Do you believe in yourself and your abilities? Can you effectively navigate conflict and challenges? Do you have well-developed social skills?

People who are self-confident believe that they can achieve success, despite any obstacles they encounter. They work hard to develop themselves in competitive environments. They are proactive, decisive and courageous in spite of fear. Take Shark Tank’s Barbara Corcoran for example. She had a terrible fear of public speaking, but she knew that she had to embrace it, rather than run from it, if she wanted to become successful. Her strategy? She thrust herself into every possible speaking opportunity she could find and worked at it like crazy. Today, she’s in demand on stages all around the globe.  Regarding self-confidence she says, “Don’t be afraid. Stand up and shout loud and clear enough for everyone to hear: “No, I am NOT stupid.”

2. Challenge

Do you thrive in environments that constantly change or present new opportunities for learning and growth?

People who embrace challenges tend to have an extraordinary ability to think and work outside the box. They enjoy exercising creativity, exploring innovation, and accepting some degree of risk. Why? They are keenly focused on achieving positive outcomes. Spiritual teacher and The Power of Now author Eckhart Tolle, teaches that challenges, difficulties and uncertainty, all concepts that point to change—and upset the status quo—are natural parts of life that should be embraced. He notes that, “Change is absolutely necessary and offers a new way of being in this world.”

3. Control

Do you feel that you have control over your life and the power to shape your destiny? How do you deal with the ebb and flow of life’s ups and downs?

People with a strong sense of control over their lives tend to be more relaxed and self-confident. They are more connected to their emotions, self-regulating and motivated to achieve results. They believe that they’ve got the power to influence their outcomes, and lo and behold they do. Peak performance expert Tony Robbins developed a five-step process aimed at helping others develop more control and achieve greater results. It’s totally worth taking a closer look, especially as part of developing an overall mental toughness strategy.

4. Commitment

Are you committed to achieving your outcomes? Do you set goals and work consistently to achieve them, even when you experience setbacks?

This is also known as “stickability.” Misty Copeland showed the world she was committed to becoming a prima ballerina, even in the face of unmistakable adversity. Her advice? Stick with it and persevere. It may seem counter intuitive, but “the path to your success is not as fixed and inflexible as you might think,” she says.

Feeling less than mentally tough?
What’s true for sure is that we all need it to succeed, no matter our background or what industry we’re in. It’s the secret sauce for performing at the top of your game, especially during tough times. And just like a lot of other important leadership traits, mental toughness is not something you’re born with. It’s developed over time it by focusing on the key components, little by little.

Work with a Business and Life Mangagement Coach to start using the 4 C’s and you will be well on your way to achieving mental toughness—and greater success. Book a complimentary session at www.denisedema.com

Source: Success