Showing posts with label positive thinking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label positive thinking. Show all posts

How to Deal With the Negative News



The Proven Health Benefits of Positive News....

Many people are grappling with this year’s depressing and disturbing news—meaning, they want to turn away, but they just can‘t.

The constant focus on partisan politics—as well as murders and mayhem—is taking a real toll on peoples’ psyches.

The surgeon Dr. Christiane Northrop says our nervous systems simply weren’t designed to handle a daily barrage of bad news which contains the worst of humanity, brought to you from every corner of the globe. The inundation is too much for most people.

The trend toward sensational bad news on television began in the 1990s. At the same time as the U.S. homicide rate was dropping in that decade by 42%, television news coverage of murders skyrocketed—rising more than 700%, according to the Center for Media and Public Affairs.

During that time, TV network news audiences and newspaper circulation began to fall. We can only guess that this was due to the increased focus on crime coverage.

Instead of gorging on an endless media diet of conflict, some people have taken drastic action, by closing their eyes and turning off the news altogether. (They are also unfriending their angry brother-in-law or friend whose partisan posts contaminate their Facebook feed.)

Completely tuning out the news, however, is not a great solution. To be an informed citizen and voter, we need to know what’s going on. Instead, I recommend that people become “selective sifters”, choosing what kind of news they take in daily. Headline news from the BBC or NPR, or perusing newspapers and magazines is enough to provide the basics.

Most people will need to make a conscious effort not to get sucked into the rancorous trivial debates of the day, like how much Melania Trump’s jacket costs when she travels into a poor neighborhood—and the inference that it should make anyone angry if they are a Liberal.

It’s not enough, though, to just sift through the bad news. Norman Cousins, a political journalist and 30-year editor of the Saturday Review said, “If news is not really news unless it is bad news, it may be difficult to claim we are an informed nation.”

There is another crucial step that people can take to relieve some of their anxiety around current events. They can write themselves a prescription for a daily dose of good news. Like a “Vitamin G” in their media diet it can provide some balanced nutrition beyond the negative news menu.

A Happy You prescription - book cover
I look at it this way: If a child is only given junk food, then that’s all he knows and wants, but if he is given some sweet carrots, watermelon or apples, he learns to appreciate them, and gets the benefit of an enriched diet and healthier body.

Thomas Jefferson said the job of journalists was to portray accurately what was happening in society. As a former TV news freelancer, I created Good News Network (GNN) because the media was failing to report enough of the positive—and it was simply too hard to find good news in large enough quantities to make a difference in one’s mental health.

An overabundance of pessimistic, depressing stories can create a perception of a crime-and-greed-filled-world that is out of proportion with reality.

Benefits to Physical Health
According to letters from GNN readers, the website is playing a major role in relieving depression and anxiety symptoms—and basic physical health, too, can be altered when you make an effort to balance the depressing news. Scientific studies have shown the startling benefits.

In a study of nearly 3000 healthy adults, a London University found that those who reported upbeat moods had lower levels of cortisol—the ‘stress’ hormone that leads to high blood pressure, weakened immune systems, and even abdominal obesity. In the study, women who reported more positive emotions were less prone to chronic inflammation, which is related to heart disease and cancer. The authors of the paper published in the American Journal of Epidemiology in 2008 said, “People need to recognize the things that make them feel good.”

Researchers at the Harvard University School of Public Health found that optimism cuts the chances of developing heart disease and the rate of lung-decline as we age. They followed 1300 men in their early 60’s for ten years. “Lung function declined significantly faster in pessimists, even taking into account major biological risk factors.”
A Dutch study of elderly men found that those who were identified as “optimistic” were associated with a stunning 50 percent lower risk of cardiovascular death during the 15-year study.

Benefits of Mental Well-Being
A study by J. P. Harrell in 2000 found that when participants watched concentrations of positive news and media, they had decreased levels of stress and anxiety. A study by Huffington Post and Harvard Researcher Shawn Achor showed that if people watched even 3-4 minutes of negative news, 27% of participants were more likely to be depressed for the next 6-8 hours of their day.

Testimonials sent to Good News Network provide self-reported anecdotal evidence that supports the notion that positive news can actually improve your health.

15 year old Lisa says, “Daily, I was affected by panic attacks which were triggered from the news and all its negative content. This site has helped me tremendously.”

Mike says, “I suffer from depression and paranoia. I feel like I can never truly be happy as I always get this sense of encroaching doom and most of my fears are heightened by media sensationalism. Your website is JUST what I need to focus.”

And finally a clinical and police psychologist, Dr. Kevin Keough, wrote this, “A 13 year-old boy was depressed and suicidal as he entered my office. He cited TV news as proof that there was no point to living, ‘Everything is out of control, it’s all bad news, people are killing each other, terrorism, corruption, kids being slaves.’ After I let him cry, I explained how TV news worked—that it didn’t reflect reality accurately—and I showed him your site. He started to cheer up. He smiled and gave me a hug. Life was okay again.”

Tal Ben-Shahar was a lecturer at Harvard University and his positive psychology course was the most popular class on campus. Author of ‘Happier’, and ‘Choose the Life You Want’, he believes the Good News Network can benefit everyone: “It’s an extremely important initiative. I recommend that each person makes it a habit to visit the website at least once a day to counter the barrage of negativity in the media. Being exposed to positive information benefits us emotionally, physically, and mentally. It can contribute in a meaningful way to a happier and healthier life.”

A 2005 study by Bayer concluded that an overwhelming 93% of Americans wanted more good news, and 77% percent believed there was not enough good news offered by mainstream media. The study also showed that people believed they are more productive in their jobs after hearing good news.

Fortunately, good news is now easy to find at GoodNews Network.

What we think in our minds directly affects our health. Through the mind-body connection, our thinking leads to stress or happiness. It is your choice—and your health depends on it.

Expand your knowledge and enlighten your mind with tools to help you excel in life. Complimentary Coaching Session at: http://www.denisedema.com/




Replace Negative Thoughts With Positive Thinking



Positive and negative thoughts can become self-fulfilling prophecies: What we expect can often come true.  

If you start off thinking you will mess up a task, the chances are that you will: You may not try hard enough to succeed, you won't attract support from other people, and you may not perceive any results as good enough. Positive thinking, on the other hand, is often associated with positive actions and outcomes. You're drawn to, and you focus on, the positive aspects of a situation. You have hope and faith in yourself and others, and you work and invest hard to prove that your optimism is warranted. You'll enthuse others, and they may well "pitch in" to help you. This makes constructive outcomes all the more likely.  When it comes down to it, positive, optimistic people are happier and healthier, and enjoy more success than those who think negatively. The key difference between them is how they think about and interpret the events in their life.

So, how do you think about your successes and failures? Do you think you have a predictable thinking pattern?

The first step in changing negative thinking is to become aware of it. For many of us, negative thinking is a bad habit – and we may not even know we're doing it! 

Consider these examples of negative thought patterns: The guy on the subway who just made a face is surely directing his behavior at you. When the receptionist doesn't greet you in the morning, you must have done something to anger her. again! You go straight to the coffee machine, because it's Monday morning and you just know you'll be solving problems until lunchtime. When you finally get to your desk, your assistant is waiting for you. "Oh no," you think. "What has he done now? The first problem of the day.”

Imagine how it makes you feel to constantly surround yourself with negativity. Then ask yourself if this is the way you tend to think in your own life? Dr Martin Seligman, who has been described as America's most influential psychologist, has done extensive research on thought patterns. In particular, he looks at the impact of an optimistic versus pessimistic outlook on life and success. He uses three basic dimensions of Permanence, Pervasiveness and Personalization, with optimistic people on one end of the scale and pessimistic people on the other.

Permanence
Believing that something we are experiencing is either permanent or temporary. The pessimist statement implies that you think bad times will carry on forever. 

Pessimist: I lost my job and I'll never find one as good again. No point even looking!
Optimist: I lost my job. Thank goodness there are other opportunities I can explore!

Pervasiveness
Believing that situational factors cause an effect or that the effect is evidence of more universal factors at work. The pessimist statement shows that you tend to think that if you've experienced a problem in one place, you'll experience that problem wherever you go.

Pessimist: I lost my job. Companies are all the same; all they care about is money. I don't know why I bother putting in any effort at all.
Optimist: I lost my job. It's too bad our company has to reinvent itself to stay competitive. Thankfully I learned some great transferable skills!

Personalization
Believing that something about you influenced the outcome or that something external to you caused it.  The pessimist tends to blame himself for bad things, rather than attributing the cause to more general factors. 
Pessimist: I lost my job. If I had been a decent employee they would have found a new job for me.
Optimist: I lost my job. I gave it my all, however they just can't use my skill set right now.

Re-shape Your Thinking
The way you view what happens around you can show whether you have a positive or negative pattern of thinking when you become more aware of your thoughts - and the effect they have on your life. 

When you're more aware of the way you think, you can take action to use positive situations to your advantage, and re-shape the negative ones. The goal is to think positively, regardless of the situation, and make a conscious effort to see opportunities instead of obstacles.

So if we look at one of the examples listed above, if you immediately think the receptionist is mad at you because she didn't say hello, how rational is that? Now change that thought to more rational outcomes like, she have been busy or distracted when you walked by or did you say hello to her? Maybe she wasn't feeling well, or she was in a negative mood herself. These are all more rational reasons for her behavior than simply assuming that you did something wrong.  Persistent negative thinking can cause mental health problems, including depression. While these positive thinking techniques have been shown to have a positive effect, they are for guidance only, and readers should take the advice of suitably qualified health professionals if they are experiencing persistent unhappiness.

Key Points
Becoming more positive is always a good thing. The more aware you are of your thoughts, the better you'll be able to change them to emphasize the positive.  Positive thinking usually attracts positive people, events, and outcomes. If you want to create an environment where you're successful and satisfied, you'll need the power of positive thinking on your side.  You may not be aware of all of your negative thoughts and the effect they have on your life, however, by taking some time to understand your own thought patterns, you can challenge those irrational, negative thoughts – and replace them with more positive, optimistic and empowering messages.

“We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts we make the world." - Buddha

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Boost Your Self-Esteem


Self-esteem is a realistic, appreciative opinion of oneself. Realistic means that we are accurately aware of our strengths and weaknesses. Appreciative means that we have overall good feelings about the person that we see. It’s about feeling whole and secure in oneself.
 
The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others. The strongest single factor in acquiring abundance is self-esteem: believing you can do it, believing you deserve it, believing you will get it. People are motivated to have high self-esteem, and having it indicates positive self-regard. 

There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity. People who do not experience self-love have little or no capacity to love others.

Do you like and accept yourself? Are you happy with whom you are? Do you have faith in yourself? Do you believe that you have what it takes to be able to lead a rich and fulfilling life? These questions are all related to your level of self-esteem.  Self-esteem is essential for success and happiness. It’s also essential in order to be able to achieve your goals. People with high self-esteem say the following about themselves:
  • I like myself as a person.
  • I’m as good as everyone else.
  • I like what I see in the mirror.
  • I am happy to be me.
  • I respect myself.
  • I’d rather be me than anyone else.
  • I’m not affected by what others say to me.
  • I have the skills and qualities to make myself a success.
  • I like taking risks.
  • I’m not afraid to make mistakes.
  • I can laugh at myself.

Here are a few ways to boost your self-esteem.

Recognize Your Intrinsic Self-Worth
The basic premise of self-esteem is that all people have intrinsic worth as a person which does not have to be earned. Intrinsic self worth is basically self love. When you feel intrinsic self worth, you are happy and satisfied with yourself as you are. Someone with intrinsic self worth does not require external awards, kudos, gold stars, or the acknowledgement of authority figures (parents, priests, teachers, etc.) in order to feel good about themselves. Someone with intrinsic self worth loves themselves unconditionally. This core human worth is not affected by external factors, this means that you don’t need to compete in order to establish your worth, or be constantly comparing yourself to others with money, looks or physical things. It means that your self-esteem is not something that is developed by any external factors.  One of the building blocks of self-esteem is recognizing your intrinsic self-worth. Seek respect mainly from thyself, for it comes first from within.

Thoughts Determine Self-Esteem
Self-esteem and circumstances are only indirectly related. Self-esteem is 100% determined by your thoughts.

One example to illustrate this point is what you say to yourself when you’re standing in front of a mirror. If you look in the mirror and think, “I’ve gained five pounds; I look fat”, you feel bad about yourself. If, instead, you think about something positive, “My hair looks nice like this”, you then feel good about yourself. The reflection in the mirror remains the same; only the thoughts change.

In addition, certain external circumstances can make it easier for you to feel good about yourself. However, external circumstances are never as powerful as your own thoughts. Here are two examples:
  • If you’re the vice-president of a major corporation and you say to yourself, “By my age I should be the President of this corporation”, you feel bad about yourself even though you hold an important position.
  • If, on the other hand, you hold a job that is not regarded by society with as much prestige but you say to yourself, “I do my job well and it allows me to pay my bills on time and spend quality time with my family which is my priority”, you feel good about yourself.
You can increase your self-esteem by changing the way in which you interpret your life, and by uncovering the negative self-statements you habitually make. You then need to create new, positive self-statements. They add that research indicates that it is more effective to stop telling yourself negative things, than to just tell yourself positive things.

In order to understand self-esteem, you need to be aware of the Pathological Inner Critic. This is the voice you hear in your head which is constantly reminding you of your failings and shortcomings. The inner critic destroys your self-esteem. In order to silence the inner critic, I recommend the following process:

1. Pay attention to your thoughts and learn to become aware of when your inner critic is doing the talking inside your head.

2. When you hear the inner critic, talk back. You can mentally say to yourself any of the following: “That’s a lie”; “Shut-up!”; “I don’t believe that”; or “That’s not so”. You can also wear a rubber band around your wrist and snap it when you hear the inner critic talking, in order to break your chain of thought.

3. Instead of being occupied with thoughts about past occurrences which may result in feelings of anxiety, sadness, regret, shame, or guilt, based on what your inner critic is saying, get up and go do something else. You can also shift your attention: look out the window, look at an object nearby and study it intently, think of something pleasant you’ve done lately, or think of someone you enjoy spending time with.

4. Schedule time to address the things you need to think about or figure out. If there’s something that’s not resolved, set aside a specific time to think about it. Then, only think about it during that designated time.  If you catch your inner critic trying to get you to think about things prematurely that interrupt your day, stop the thoughts and make it wait so it has a place and time instead of allowing it to rummage through your head the entire day. Worrying about things with no result in sight only disrupts your ability to focus on other things that are important.

5. Replace the inner critic with a positive voice. Compliment yourself or repeat a positive affirmation. Stop the thoughts that are negative and replace them with good thoughts to create a habit that will become second nature in time. 

Keep Your Self-Esteem Muscles Strong
Self-esteem is a mental muscle that must be developed and maintained through regular psychological workouts. Here are some of the “workouts” recommended.

1. Pursue something you’re passionate about each day, even if it’s just for fifteen minutes. This can be gardening, hitting golf balls, taking a walk at the beach, reading a chapter in a book or reading a bedtime story to your child over the phone if you have to work late. Actively seek out activities and projects that generate passion.

2. Instead of just giving yourself credit only when you achieve a goal, stop to recognize your efforts. Make a list of things that you give your 100% to.

3. Put up a self-esteem bulletin board in a place where you can see it often and fill it with things that make you feel good: an email from a client thanking you for your great work, a photo of yourself that you like, a painting your child made especially for you, and so on. Update your collection once a month. This is a visual aid that does wonders for your mental state of mind each day when you see it. It sets a positive path for you.

Conclusion
The reputation you have with yourself - your self-esteem - is the single most important factor for a fulfilling life. 

Get the tools you need to excel in your life by working with Denise Dema, a Business and Life Management Coach who has over 20 years experience empowering individuals, executives and business owners to attain self-defined success in their professional & personal lives. Book a complimentary session at http://www.denisedema.com to get started in reaching your personal and professional goals today!

You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love & affection. ~Buddha