Learn How to Reach Your Goals

The New Year is a beginning, so new goals and resolutions, new plans, new dreams and new directions fuel your thoughts.

What is it about this annual “new” that causes us to reflect upon our lives and our accomplishments? I believe each of us has a natural inclination to grow our self-esteem and capability through new accomplishments. Most of us want to make a difference in the world. Most of us want to live life as fully as we can. Thus, we annually draw a new line in the sand and claim a starting point for our next chapter.

It’s been said that everyone has goals, whether we know it or not. We have goals to keep our current job, or to get a different one. Start a new relationship or make an existing one better. We have goals to save for the future, or to travel, take a vacation, or purchase the things we need and want to make our lives more enjoyable. An important distinction, however, is that top achievers are very intentional and focused on their goals, while many of the rest of us are not.

Successful people know that the wording, structure, timing and format of a goal can make its achievement much easier – or far more difficult. Top achievers understand the basic skills for setting and reaching their goals, every time! They know how to design goals that create success. Here are the important steps to set and achieve your goals:

Reachable goals are SPECIFIC. The brain must know exactly, precisely, what it is trying to accomplish. Never word a goal with vague terms like “some” or “a little bit”, or “more”. Be specific! If you want to lose 8 pounds and reach a weight of 175, specify those exact numbers. If you want to save $200 this month, be exact. Your brain can help you accomplish almost anything if it knows precisely what you are aiming for.

Reachable goals are SIMPLE. Many people describe their goals in complex terms of retiring on the beach in Hawaii, with nice cars and lots of money, and…. Their list goes on and on. Any ONE of those things is a great goal, but the combination becomes over whelming and the brain gets confused. If you want to retire in Hawaii, just say so! If you want to increase your sales by 10% this month, say so! Keep your goals simple, clear, and focused.

Reachable goals are SIGNIFICANT. No one can muster the enthusiasm, hard work and courage to reach a goal they don’t really care about. A reachable goal is one you really, really want! You must own your goals. It’s something that will change your life, enhance your health or wealth, and make you proud. It gets your juices flowing, gets you up in the morning, and keeps you going all day long, because it is important! Set goals that are worth achieving and that add value to your life!

Reachable goals are STRATEGIC. The best goals accomplish many great outcomes, all at one time. Running a 10K race will almost certainly: 1) feel great! 2) help you lose weight. 3) lower your cholesterol level 4) strengthen your heart 5) lower you risk of heart disease 6) increase your energy and stamina, and 7) improve your outlook. Design your goals to strategically impact as many areas of your life as possible. You’ll have more reasons to reach your goal and more excitement when you do!

Reachable goals are MEASURABLE. A goal without a measurable outcome is just a pipe-dream. You can’t achieve a pound of “happiness” or 6 inches of “self-esteem”, but you CAN get a new job. You CAN run a mile in under 7 minutes, or do 100 sit-ups. Someone has wisely observed that, “What gets measured, gets done.” Define your goals in terms of height, weight, dollars, inches, or hours. Then measure your progress until you achieve your desired outcome.

Reachable goals are RATIONAL. To reach your goal, you will need a plan, a path, and a vehicle for getting there. Your goals must make sense! When you explain them to friends and family, your goals should create excitement, draw support, and encouragement. Your goals should be just out of reach, but not out of sight! You want to stretch to be your best, not strain after impossible dreams. Set goals you CAN and WILL achieve!

Reachable goals are TANGIBLE. Choose goals that you can see, hear, smell or touch. Go for things you will enjoy and that you can clearly visualize. The brain has hard time going for “financial security”, but it can visualize a bank statement with nice, large numbers on it! Define your goals in terms that excite the senses, and then go for it with all your heart!

Reachable goals are WRITTEN. High achievers always know precisely what they want, because they’ve written it down. Often, they write a short description of their goals every single morning or affirmations as a personal reminder of their priorities and their objectives. The act of writing your goals down vastly increases your chance of success. Write it down! Then, keep your notes where you can see and read them every day.

Reachable goals are SHARED. We are far more likely to stick to our plan and reach our goals if we know our friends and family support us. Being part of a team increases our determination, our stamina, and our courage. Caution: Choose wisely who you surround yourself with. Never share your goals with anyone who may ridicule, tease or discourage you! The world is full of doubters and you have no time for them. But, find a support team, a group of cheerleaders, and a coach who will encourage you every step of the way. High achievers count on and work with other positive people and winners!

Reachable goals are CONSISTENT WITH YOUR VALUES. This is one area that people really need to do some work in in in order to make the rest of the puzzle fit. One of the biggest reasons people fail to achieve their goals is that they have conflict between their behavior and their values. However, when your values and your goals are in agreement, there is no stopping you! Clarify your values first, then set simple, specific, measurable, tangible, written goals that are consistent with those values. You will achieve them, every single time!

Get the tools you need to achieve your goals and excel in your life. Work with Denise Dema, a Business and Life Management Coach who has over 20 years’ experience empowering individuals, executives and business owners to attain self-defined success in their professional & personal lives. Denise’s passion for personal development is at the core of her business and life philosophy and is committed to helping others achieve their full potential in order to live richer, more fulfilling lives. Book a complimentary session at http://www.denisedema.com to get started in reaching your personal and professional goals today! On-site, phone, e-mail coaching available.

Leadership Tools - Building Confidence in Others

Do you ever wonder how great leaders create self-assured teams?

Think about watching a sports match between two teams, where one team is more confident than the other. The members of the more confident team know that they have a good chance of winning. As a result, everyone on the team makes good decisions, and the players work together seamlessly. Meanwhile, the other team's confidence is shaky. Players doubt their abilities, they hesitate, and they don't commit fully to any particular course of action. When this happens, it's likely that the more confident team will win.

The same principles apply in the workplace - when you have people on your team who have low self-confidence, this can hold them back from reaching their full potential.

This is why it's important that we do what we can to boost the confidence of those around us, especially if we're leading a team.

Recognizing Low Self-Confidence
People who lack self-confidence rarely thrive. They see more risks than opportunities, they don't perform particularly well in new situations, and they often have low self-esteem. What's more, they rarely trust their own judgment, and they may see any successes that they do achieve as resulting from luck, rather than from their own efforts.

By contrast, people who have high self-confidence are more productive and more effective, and can raise the morale of the entire group. They're also more comfortable taking risks, which can have benefits for their own careers, as well as for their teams.

Confidence can make or break people's ability to achieve their life goals. So how can you help boost the self-confidence of the people around you?

Help Them Develop Knowledge and Skills
Chances are that there are several skills you rely on to do your job well. When you use these skills successfully, what happens? You feel confident! These are the skills that you've worked on over the years, and you're comfortable that you can use them to accomplish the task at hand.
The same is true for the people on your team. The stronger their skills are, the more confident they're going to feel.

So a good way to increase the self-confidence of people in your team is by encouraging learning, and by providing plenty of opportunities for additional training. The more knowledge and skills that people have to do their job, the more confident they're going to feel, especially when they approach challenging projects.

Set Clear Goals and Help Them Achieve Them
Many people get confidence from completing tasks and projects successfully. But that confidence only comes if people know what it is that they're supposed to do.

This is why it is so important to set clear goals for every member of your team. Goals define success, and give people an objective to shoot for. Without them, they're working aimlessly.

So make sure that the people on your team know what goals they're supposed to be working toward, and help them to achieve these goals. Then, when they succeed, celebrate their achievements!

Help Them Identify "Triggers"
All of us experience fluctuations in our confidence - some tasks or situations lift us up, while others can cause our confidence to drop.

If you work with someone who has low self-confidence, help him to identify his "trigger situations." By knowing what causes his confidence to waver, he can work to build the knowledge and skills he needs to feel more confident.

To do this, grab a piece of paper and a pen, and sit down with this person. Divide the page into two columns. On one side, ask him to list the situations that make him feel confident. This could be anything, from writing the corporate blog to helping shape your department's budget. Anything that makes him feel happy and confident should go on this list. Then, next to each task, have him write down why he's confident in these situations. What knowledge or skill is he using that makes him feel good?

Next, ask him to list the situations that don't make him feel confident. This could include giving presentations, expressing his opinion in meetings, or writing a report. Why doesn't he feel confident in these situations? What new knowledge and skills would help him feel better in each scenario?

It can be an eye-opening experience to identify these triggers. But, once he can see which skills he could improve on, he'll be more motivated to face his fears.

You could also use role playing with him. This is a useful technique that allows him to practice succeeding in low-confidence scenarios. To do this, you'll need to talk to this person about his self-confidence, which may be something that he instinctively tries to avoid. You're much more likely to be successful if you have this conversation as part of a coaching or mentoring relationship.

Encourage Autonomy
If you want your team to tackle tasks with confidence, it's important that you allow them the autonomy to make their own decisions. When your people have the power to decide what needs to be done, they start to take ownership of their work. It truly becomes their responsibility, and when they succeed, their confidence can soar.

Whenever you can, delegate tasks and give your people the power to make their own decisions. Be aware, however, that people who have low self-confidence may resist this at first: after all, they may doubt that they'll make the right decisions. To fight these doubts, encourage them to take on small, achievable projects. Then, if they rely on you too much for help or guidance, encourage them to be more independent This will push them to make their own decisions, instead of running to you for help or advice.

Celebrate Success
It's important that all of us celebrate the success we've achieved, because recognition of success builds self-confidence. Whenever your people accomplish a goal or hit a key target, then celebrate with them! Reward them with a gift certificate, party at the office, or even do something small like bringing in donuts, cookies or cake. At the very least, congratulate them on their success, and let them know how much you appreciate their hard work.

It's also important to keep your team excited about what they're doing. Celebrating success helps with this, but keeping motivation high long-term is key to building a team with high confidence levels..

Encourage Positive Thinking
Many people who lack self-confidence focus on negative thoughts. They may think things like, "I can't do that!" or "I'm not smart enough." These negative thoughts cause people to spiral down further, reinforcing their belief that they'll never be good enough to succeed. Of course, this just makes things worse!

Encourage people to think positively. One technique is to show them how to "flip their thoughts" - every time they catch themselves thinking a negative thought, teach them to think its rational opposite.

For instance, if they think "I'm not smart enough to finish this project," instead they should think "I know I have the knowledge and skills to finish this project. If I do need help, I can always ask for it." Flipping a thought from negative to positive creates a subtle shift in our minds. The change in our outlook and energy is almost palpable, so this technique can make a big difference in confidence!

Balancing Self-Confidence and Over-Confidence
When people become more self-confident there's always the risk they can become over-confident, or even arrogant. There's no doubt that there is a fine line here, but once it's crossed, these people can start to impact the morale and productivity of the group in a negative way. What's worse is when people get careless, because they over-estimate their own ability to improvise in difficult situations.

If this happens to a person on your team, start by gently bringing the situation to their attention. Chances are that they might not have realized that they crossed the line into arrogance. Meet with them in private, be specific about what their saying or doing, and explain why their behavior could be construed as arrogance. If their behavior has caused tension or upset in the team, then make sure that you let them know. Usually, when people are aware that their behavior is hurting others, they're motivated to change.


Key Points
If you work with people who have low self-confidence, there are several ways that you can help.

First, encourage them to develop additional knowledge and skills. Help them set clear goals, and sit down with them to identify specific situations that cause their confidence to plummet.

If you're leading a team, give your people as much power as you can to make their own decisions, and celebrate the success they achieve along the way. But remember that too much self-confidence can be just as damaging to your team as low self-confidence, so help them find the right balance.

Confidence is key in working effectively and productively. So do everything that you can to help boost other people's confidence, as well as your own. You'll start to see huge improvements in people's performance!

Get the tools you need to excel in your professional and personal life. Work with a Business Coach that specializes in the development of human potential and personal effectiveness. Book a complimentary session today!

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