Showing posts with label choices. Show all posts
Showing posts with label choices. Show all posts

One Single Day Cannot Define You

One day cannot dictate the whole course of your life. Even if you feel it is the worst day of your entire existence, it is a small blip in the grand scheme of things.

What happened has happened – and it is over and done with. It is a small moment compared to the billions of choices and paths that lay in our future.

Real, sustainable growth is never sudden and rapid. Instead, it is growth that happens incrementally over long periods of time.
It is the small things we do on a daily basis that build who we become in the future, and the impact we leave on the world long after we’ve passed away.

Our minds are built to focus on significant events in our lives. When something makes us really sad or deeply disturbs us, our mind ruminates over it to find a solution or a way to cope.

Rumination is when we think about an event in our lives over and over again. Some psychologists believe it can aid in problem-solving, but when rumination goes haywire it can bring us into a state of depression. That’s because we are constantly thinking about something that we no longer have any control over. Thus, we feel powerless and hopeless.

We can overcome this negative cycle by changing our perspective. When you get stuck in these narrow patterns of thought, “zoom out” and see the bigger picture of your life. Change your thoughts from making it monumental to a moment that will pass. This will remind you that no single day can ever define you and your future.

Each day we make hundreds of choices. These each direct the course of our lives. And it is in these individual choices where we have real power and freedom over what our lives become.

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Stop Over Analyzing and Live Life!

Sometimes we often contemplate life from every angle. We weigh the pros and cons of every endeavor, every relationship to ensure we don’t take one false step. Unfortunately most of the time they do not protect us from mistakes, nor do they protect us from the very things we are looking to avoid.

Over analyzing life is the major cause of procrastination, and insidious thought. The more you think, the more you conjure up thoughts of how the world is out to get you or that you aren’t capable of attaining whatever goals you desire. We sabotage ourselves. Others don’t sabotage us unless we let them. But more often we do it to ourselves. Over and over until it becomes a part of our psyche and we have to self reprogram our minds into a healthy disposition.

We must rid our thoughts of self defeating feelings. Whether you feel you’re not good enough to date a particular person, or that you’re unqualified for a particular job, you are entitled to anything you want just as anyone else is. No one can make you believe it but you. Just as one obsesses about how they aren’t capable, one can choose to think that they are. It’s the choices they make that determine the happiness of their life. Not circumstances.

Choice is the key word in all of this. It’s what one chooses to think about. For many they consume their minds with needless, irrelevant processes that sap their energy or forms negative energy that they in turn… attract. We are what we attract and attracting these negative forces in our life is our own doing. We have the power to change it. But often many people over analyze themselves into negative dispositions that consume their thoughts, until they manifest it themselves in life.

Life is meant to be lived. The greatest people the world has ever known became great by making things happen and not merely thinking about them and every pitfall that may arrive along the way. You owe it to yourself to be the best person you can be and that starts in your head.  It’s unnatural to be positive every second of the day, but we can choose how we digest and manifest information. How we cope with the information we’re given is a reflection of how we think about ourselves. Many things you will analyze will never materialize, because they are figments of your imagination.

You cannot assume what people are thinking. You cannot assume what people will do. You cannot assume that someone is thinking of you when you are, or in the way you are. It’s a ridiculous process that only feeds fear and uncertainty. Focus on you, and what you’re doing, and don’t make judgments on the hypothetical.

Over analyzing can cripple you to non action. Free your mind of these negative thoughts and bathe in the glorious ether of self awareness and confidence. The more you do the more you’ll be focused on things that will make you happy, and less on those negatives you attract.

Learn to stop over analyzing and embrace the life you were meant to live! Work with a Business and Life Management Coach that specializes in human development and personal effectiveness for individuals and professionals. Book a complimentary session today!

Embrace the Moment and Learn To Be Happy

Simply by learning to embrace and live in the moment you can achieve the happiness that seems to elude most people. Simple living is a concept that most people can’t imagine because the world is so complicated. Actually your world is what you have made of it and its pace has been created by you. Think for a minute of a typical day in your life. Is it rushed from the time you wake up? Are you stressed about everything along the way or is it calm and peaceful throughout the day? The way you are living is what you have chosen, not what has been given to you. Your life is the blueprint of the choices you have made, and will only change when you change the plan. Being happy is all relative to what it is that makes you happy. Everyone can learn to embrace the moment and be free of the patterns they have created. Think about if you are living your life expecting someone else to make you happy, or are you taking responsibility for your own happiness? Do you you rely on money, family and friends to make your world happy even though those are outside forces that were created by your own decisions? Why can’t you live in the moment if it brings you joy instead of expecting something more from others?

A good place to start is with your own internal dialogue and what is in your head. If you tell yourself each morning that you are able to handle things calmly and honestly, and then remind yourself throughout the day that you are what you think, and then you will start to become aware of your actions. Look at the things that take place throughout your day without judgment so there is less stress in your life. Treat others with respect and respect will be given to you in return. Happiness comes from within, but how you have chosen to live in the external world that you have created, will determine how often you feel peace, joy, and respect. To be able to live with an attitude of gratitude and to be thankful for the simple things that cross your path every day will bring you more joy. Allowing that joy to enter your heart will bring peace to your soul. Internal peace is always found through self awareness and growth.

Make a list of the things that make you happy and look at how much, or how often those things are in your life now. Each day you should surround yourself with what actually brings you joy. First, knowing what those things are, and then creating the space for them will be the start of making joy prevalent in your life. You must also start to create boundaries and eliminate the things and people that are not serving you as well. Stop giving your energy each day to things that drain you. Start becoming aware of how you spend your time and what moments you are missing along the way. Appreciating simple pleasures each day will slow your mind down and bring you back to the basics of feeling joyful. Being aware of what’s right in front of you will force you into the moment. Embracing the many little moments that take place in a day can bring a lifetime of happiness and joy to your life.

Find a minute of peace in your day or evening to just close your eyes and give thanks with a happy heart for all your blessings. Call people you love more often and spend less time with those who are always angry. Create an outside activity each day even if it’s for 15 minutes and connect with the world. Commit yourself to organize something in your home or at work to get your surroundings in line with your values. Make a commitment to change just one thing today and embrace the moment, even if the moment is reading this article. Take a deep breath and close your eyes. Once you are relaxed, open your eyes and think about what you just read and how you can apply something to your present circumstance.

It’s really up to you to make the simple changes that will help you embrace moments that can bring you happiness. If your world is so complicated that you can’t stop and feel some joy throughout your day, then enjoyment of the moment is lost. Stress and judgment will not bring you the happiness you deserve. You always have the power to bring joy into your life because your life is your own, and happiness is a choice. Uncomplicate the day and release the negative thoughts in your mind. The simple things that make you truly happy will become more prevalent and those moments you embrace will define your happiness.

“When we are capable of living in the moment free from the tyranny of “shoulds,” free from the nagging sensation that this moment isn’t right, we will have peaceful hearts. “ -- Joan Borysenko

Denise Dema is a Business and Life Management Coach who has over 20 years experience empowering individuals, entrepreneurs and business owners to attain self-defined success in their professional & personal lives. To learn more about the author and her practice please visit